Hola people,
Do you want to know the actual reason behind your anxiety? Do you want to know how to be instantly happy? Do you struggle with finishing things and the burden of unfinished tasks deteriorating things for you? Then...you are at the right place. By the end of this post, you'll get answers and reliable solutions for all these questions and issues.
#TheQuestToLeisureBegins
Let me give you my real-life example which definitely will make your way smooth in understanding the easy-complicated concept.
Past few weeks, I was feeling miserable and I was doing pathetic. I was all-healthy, hadn't faced a recent failure and there was absolutely nothing that was putting my mind into an abnormal state. But, there was no inner peace, I wasn’t happy at all. I was feeling anxious throughout the day and the anxiety was worsening. I was getting more obnoxious and losing my cool even in the most unlikely situations. Due to this, I was losing hold of my relationships. Now, due to dysfunctional relationships, I was becoming even more frustrated. Due to all this, I was trailing behind in all the important matters and breaching all the deadlines. This all forced me to gradually sink into a vicious circle with its radius equal to infinite.
The worst being, this wasn’t happening for the first time; I had faced this kind of hyper-anxious situation tens of times before. Every time I had pledged myself – ‘Alright Anant…this is it!!!! You’ll never get yourself indulged in this ‘oh f*ckkk’ situation again’. But unfortunately, never stood with it, as I wasn't aware of the exact reason.
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| Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash |
As I was all set and committed to do some brainstorming this morning and find the actual reason behind this abnormal behavior of mine; I procrastinated it for four more days and that instead of alleviating my toxic thoughts, made them even worse. Finally, as I was reading the audiobook Finish: Give Yourself the Gift Of Done by Jon Acuff on Wizdom ( The best app for audiobooks I ever have tried. Getting an annual subscription of it is indeed one of the most worthy investments of 2021, I have made ) this morning, a strong flash of ‘ohkayyyyyy, that’s it!!!’ struck my mind. And, within few minutes, I actually got the answers to all my queries regarding my biggest weakness. As I completed it, everything was crystal clear. I had got the answers to all the questions and the solutions for getting me out of this distressing trap.
Alright, let me ask you a simple question - Have you ever left a task unfinished?
I do have left most of the tasks and that somehow is the protagonist of the story I am gonna narrate now. Let me bring some numbers in the picture to give you a better explanation (We Engineers are good with numbers right?!) Following is my inner voice, followed by the levels of peace, anxiety, and output on a scale of 0-100%.
Waking up in the morning, the first commitment I make -‘Let me finish the first unit of economics today'. Peace level: 100%, Anxiety level: 0, Output: 95% (100% would be a hyperbole)
An hour later, completing just 60% of the unit- 'Let me first do two chapters of sociology optional. It’ll give me more confidence'. Peace level : 70%, Anxiety level : 30%, Output : 75%
Covering just 40% of the first chapter - ‘Well...I haven’t revised polity for a while. Let me do it first’. Peace level : 50%, Anxiety level : 50%, Output : 55%
Hardly revising 30% of it - 'I better practice answer writing, it’s the most important thing to do. Let me write 5 answers'. Peace level : 30%, Anxiety level : 70%, Output : 30%
After writing one answer - ‘Oh God, how come I forget to attend the creative writing course lectures. Let me first complete it---Oh noooooo!!! What about the blog post, I anyhow have to complete it today’. Peace level : 10%, Anxiety level : 90%, Output : 10%
After attending one lecture - ‘why on the earth I am not able to concentrate!!!! Let me take some rest today. I will do it by tomorrow'. Peace level : 0, Anxiety level : 100%, Output : -10% (yes, negative output!)
And this keeps on happening for days and weeks. Every morning I wake up with peace at its full, anxiety at its minimum, and output at its best. But eventually, through the course of the day, due to leaving every task in abeyance and unfinished - it gets turned into 0, 100, and 0 respectively, and the entire day gets ruined.
You are distressed in this very moment, you're anxious, you're finding it hard to concentrate where you must be well-focused - the reason is this, my friend! No one else is responsible but you!!! All the tasks, assignments, projects, and plannings you have left incomplete; all the chapters, subjects, and unfinished work you have left to do later is making you obnoxious and self-alienated.
Let me carve this more clearly - imagine you go to a salon and the hairdresser leaves your hair half-cut; imagine you watching an interesting movie and someone with due respect, throws you out of the hall just before the climax; imagine you having a wonderful 'blindfolded sex' with an unknown partner & you're absolutely loving it, and just before you are about to get an intense orgasm, someone wakes you up; imagine you construct a beautiful lavish villa, but leave the front elevation on bricks only: no plaster, no paint...nothing!
Unless you are a typical rapper who just can't breathe if the grass on his head looks normal, or you're watching an Abhishek Bacchan's movie, or you just get to know that the partner you're having a good time with is your boss only, or you've gone bankrupt that you haven't left with a single penny; but, in all other cases, you'll find that these acts of incompleteness will ruin your peace and focus. The strange feeling of an abnormal haircut, the mindboggling curiosity about what happens next in the movie, the regret of not getting the best orgasm of your life and the hidden desire of an 'all complete' villa will snatch inner happiness from every minute of your life.
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| Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash |
This exact similar phenomenon happens to you every time you leave anything incomplete. There's a specific term for this which is called THE ZEIGARNIK EFFECT. It simply states that until you finish your assigned work, the thoughts of unfinished work will continuously pop into your mind; and these thoughts won't let you focus anywhere and make you anxious like hell.
Anxiety is a termite, my friend, you know it well...it gradually hollows your life and pushes you into a vicious circle that does nothing but, deteriorate things for you. There are many a solution to get you out of this, but, let me stick myself to the anxiety in the context of the Zeigarnik effect only.
Here are four simple ways which have helped me get out of this distressing trap, and I am sure they certainly will for you.
1. Stop running after perfectionism:
This may sound ambiguous to many of you, but, it's true my friend. In the pursuit of perfection, you don't realise that you aren't doing anything and you aren't finishing anything. In a nutshell, what according to you is better - doing 10 assignments with 80-90% efficiency or, hardly finishing 1 with 99% ( 100% is a myth by the way)? Do I need to answer?
I used to have and to some extent, I still have a weak retention power. In the desire of 100% retention, in the desire of remembering each and every book verbatim, I hardly could complete one book in months or one chapter in weeks! But, post this brainstorming, I have found that it's not necessary to remember 100% of what I read, but, what's really important is to keep moving ahead, complete the top-priority tasks and gradually finish the entire syllabus. That keeps the anxiety at the bay and saves me from falling into that vicious trap.
For a better understanding of this, I recommend you to read "The gifts of imperfection" by Brene Brown, it will give you some wonderful insights about this.
2. Oh please...stop multitasking, stick to one thing only!
a. Assign priorities to all your tasks.
b. Focus on the most prioritised task, finish it and then move ahead.
c. Keep yourself miles away from the distractions.
Stop being greedy my friend! Be aware of the fact that you can't 'efficiently' finish two things in the time of one. If you have taken a task in hand, please don't be cynical about it. Trust thyself. Don't feel like - instead of this, I better should do that to fetch better results. The human mind and satisfaction are the opposite ends of a magnet. Even religious epics have said that a human mind will never be fully satisfied with its choices & priorities, and desire is somehow its biggest enemy. Thus, do stick yourself to one task only, finish it with all your heart, and have belief in mind that this will fetch me results.
3. Pamper yourself buddy: stop doubting and start loving
This always happens with me - whenever I am writing a blog post, poetry, or an article; whenever I do something that's part of my hobby like singing, playing guitar, or preparing a monologue; whenever I am reading a non-academic book or spending time in polishing my non-technical skills - I always feel, this won't reap any benefits and I am just wasting my precious time. But, the moment I finish doing any of these tasks, I feel jubilant and content. And this jubilance and content complement me in completing the academic assignments more efficiently and exactly on time.
Don't be a couch potato who does nothing but rote learning. It also will drag you into a different kinda anxiety, which is even worse. Also, if I am talking about unfinished tasks, I am referring to all, and not just the academic ones. So, if you feel like - 'let me leave this article unfinished, let me not record the complete song now, let me not finish this book...all this won't hamper much of my happiness', you are wrong my friend, I have faced it!
This reminds me of one of the most hard-hitting dialogues from the movie, Raees - "Koi bhi dhandha chhota nahi hota, aur dhandhe se bada koi dharma nahi hota." (No matter what you do, do it with all your heart and you'll ultimately become a stalwart in it.)
4. Do understand that you won't be able to do anything efficiently if you're anxious:
As I have given the detailed analysis above - your peace and output are inversely proportional with anxiety. Being anxious, you'll always lag behind in all the walks of your life. Don't live in an illusion that you won't let your anxiety disturb your focus, and irrespective of how anxious you are, you'll still be able to complete all your assignments efficiently. This never happens!
Better get yourself free from anxiety and then start doing your work. For that, first, do finish what you have once started!
On a concluding note...I must say that I feel better nowadays, I am happier, I am doing more work than I used to do, and best of all - I am more confident about achieving my goals now. It's all because I have learned to finish the tasks one at a time. I had been procrastinating in writing this blog post for a couple of weeks, and finally, I have done it today. I have ultimately completed the top priority task after three weeks of laggardness. This is giving me a sense of accomplishment and as a latent function, now it will also be easier for me to concentrate better on my studies.
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Your suggestions and ideas are always welcome. They'll always help me grow and get better.
Cheers,
Please go, and finish the unfinished tasks...