1. Dare not to quit (I know it’s a cliché, but read the text below and you’ll understand how crucial it really is)
Innumerable
times it has been justified by people out there, that those
who do not quit on their dreams, despite facing unbearable strife, torments, and
difficulties, certainly achieve their desires and goals in the future. Life's
never gonna be all hunky dory, neither it'll throw only the flowers of glee at you, nor titillate
your happiness hormones all the time. In fact, it will keep challenging you to the extremities of a litany of problems. I have seen countless people who just didn't give up on their dreams, countering all the constraints
(no matter how severe), dealing with all kinda toxicities in their life, and
facing the brunt of their relationship/family/societal complexes. And as a result of that, they presently occupy the apex
positions in their professional and personal lives which they once dreamt of. At
this juncture, you may feel like you're living the most terrible life,
and the hardships that you're going through aren't faced by anyone else out
there. True, that your life has been difficult, and has tested you to horrible
levels; but giving up on it, making a tragic move, and deliberately putting
your own life in jeopardy is never going to make anything easier for you. It'll
just add to your sorrow and will deteriorate your already sorry state to a further low.
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| Photo by KAL VISUALS on Unsplash |
2. Fight it alone pal: No one's coming for your rescue
Are
you suffering from depression & anxiety, and getting rejection almost everywhere
in life? Or are you feeling like the loneliest person in the world, and living a
life full of despair? Struggling through the above downs
in life, you may be expecting the world i.e. your dearest friends, family
members you can always count on, well-wishers having all affection for you, and
even the absolute strangers; that after seeing you in such a pathetic state, they
will show some pity, and will come for your rescue. They will give you
the support you need and will take you out of the debilitating condition you
are in. But I feel sorry to say that, none of the above is true, as no one really cares. No matter how cordial a relationship you share with your partner, or how warm commitments they have made
in the past; all these cordial relationships and lifelong commitments just go
for good when things actually start to take an ugly turn. I know that's a bold truth,
but it's sensible and full of wisdom. In fact, close your eyes for a moment, wear your thinking hat, and give this a serious thought - how come you expect anyone in this world (no matter how much they love you, or
you them) to take charge of your life, happiness, and success? Literally, no one
in this world, (no matter how close they are to you) is compelled to do so in
any circumstance, neither you should expect. Say you are going through a melancholic phase in
your life, and finding it really hard to spend even a second of sheer calm; you
really need to understand here that no one else, not even your dearest ones can
completely take you out of these complex times, no matter how influential or powerful they
are. Or imagine you are going through a filthy breakup, or your partner has
cold-bloodedly ghosted/cheated on you, and at the same time to further
complicate the situation, your career is also pelting failure’s stones at you. Getting
exhausted facing the above, now you're expecting your loved ones to acknowledge
all the fu*k ups in your life, take your distressed life in cognizance, and empathize with you worrying over the tough state you are in. Deep inside your broken heart, you are having expectations for them to lend you a caring shoulder. At the same time, you are
mindlessly wanting them to accompany you & take you out of times of
doom, help you crack the exam/interview you're aspiring for, and to help you
forget about your partner who happens to be the sole perpetrator for the depressed
state you are in. Definitely, if the above situation was real, the world would
have been a utopian place. But unfortunately, that’s not the case, and will
never be, at least in the centuries to come. So, as long as utopian times aren’t
coming, learn to live your life without getting dependent on anyone (except the
psychiatrist, counselor, or clinical psychologist in extreme cases). Literally
no one, no matter how much he/she loves or cares for you, could ever help you
to get yourself out of a soul-wrenching heartbreak, or make you achieve the
goals you quest for. Only you yourself have got the power to do that, and that’s
why this very moment is the perfect time to take charge of your own life and stop depending on anyone else in the outer world to support you in accomplishing your goals.
3. Live a life sans emotions (yes, it may sound weird, but holds value)
A lot of people might have read the above point with skepticism. Well…those who really have tasted the shaky waters of life's ocean, and have gone through all its inclement seasons, won't need clarification on the above. Still, for the ones who didn’t take it the way I intended to – ‘sans emotions’ doesn't mean at any cost that I am exhorting you to live a ruthless life as of a criminal, having no ‘legitimate’ empathy for the world, or deliberately sabotaging others. It rather should be understood in the way that you need not let your life get impacted with the outer world's happenings, and with the actions of people who are directly or indirectly attached to you. In simplest terms, you should invest in building a stoic personality. But let me reiterate again, seeing one in a perilous situation, and not helping him; or not being generous to the one who is desperately in need of your help - at any cost aren't the traits of a person who considers himself a stoic. It actually means not letting the external world affect your mental and emotional health, which eventually keeps a positive check on your physical well-being as well in the long run. Without any doubt, a happening state of mental & emotional health is the key to an overall healthy life and vice versa. Say you’re suffering from a terrible heartbreak, or your partner has ghosted you at the most crucial juncture of your life. Being stoic here will help you to minimize the excruciating pain that you'll go through, and help you get over one of the most unfortunate hurdles in your life in a comparatively easier way. Otherwise, failing to keep your emotions in control in this scenario, you'll find yourself struggling with abject agony. I know it's never easy (in fact, it’s damn complicated) to confront the problems' sword in life with the stoic's shield; but if you won't do so, as I mentioned in the first point above, your life will gradually turn into hell, people who antagonize with you will keep making phenomenal progress in their lives, while your situation will just keep deteriorating with time. So, it’s always better to keep making significant strides & putting in stupendous efforts in the right direction, and keep reinforcing your mental strength by always keeping your emotions in check. Adopt this lesson, and see how miraculously your life blossoms.
Read all my blog posts themed around 'Life Lessons' here - peace, and start living life king-size.