'To Women, from Men' | Lessons to all Men on the Intn'l Women's Day

"India, how magnificent! 

Pristine forests, vibrant biodiversity, tranquil countryside. What else does one need! An absolute treat to senses". Natasha said in an overwhelming amazement.

"Indeed! I pity those who say trash, hurl misinformation, and deliberately defame this country. It's actually much cleaner, safer, and more serene, way beyond my expectations. Perception towards this pious land of sheer beauty needs to be changed around the globe". Andrew reverted.

Natasha & Andrew Smith, a 'travel-junkie' couple from Spain on a bike trip to India were exploring the jungles of Jharkhand in their final leg of the journey. 

On their last night in India, after a long day, they fell into a deep slumber in each other's arms, cherishing the vivid beauty of their surroundings in a makeshift tent under the divine shade of the star-studded sky and the dazzling moon's radiance.

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"An…d…rew c…ould yo…u sense some movement in the bushes out?" Natasha whispered in halfsleep.

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"Ahem...let me sleep darling, it may be a herbivore wild. We are in a safe zone. Possibly a herd of deer is taking a night stroll." Andrew murmured unwillingly.

As soon as she could utter a word, seven monsters with human faces barged into their tent.

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"We were all hearts for this country and the people about how special and safe they made us feel. Please..." (Natasha begged in a formidable tone).

Before she could utter another word, the monsters forced her mouth shut with a handkerchief.

Her husband was terribly beaten up and thrown out of the tent with his hands and legs tied.

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(Monsters painting indelible black on the faces of the entire male fraternity of India)

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*** 

Ladies,

Our stature shrinks with shame, eyes sob tears of excruciating pain, and blood boils in anger hearing such heinous acts of crime. Our hearts go out to the victims for the agony they have been through.

From inching the Himalayas to measuring the extremities of outer space; from making remarkable strides in all fields of science to ruling the vibrant entrepreneurial space; from emerging out victorious on the artistic front to taking apex positions in global sporting events - women have done it all, and how!

I have had the good fortune of being with (and around) amazing women during which they have taught me innumerable lessons from all walks of life. From bashing unpleasant societal stigmas & stereotypes, to fiercely battling their own biological downs; from practising emotional resilience irrespective of how gloomy the situations are, to strongly facing all kinds of cumbersome situations; from leaving remarkable imprints in academics as well as in jobs, to garnering accolades in myriad number of branches; and from becoming a paragon of warmth & immense affection, to impressively discarding any kind of toxicity or fringe off their life - the list could go on and on.

Photo by Guille Álvarez on Unsplash

Being a student of advertising, I have always had much of a penchant towards creative ad campaigns resonating around social change. Case in point, Ariel India's #ShareTheLoad campaign.

This masterpiece embraces your commitment receptors (towards your partners), subtly reminds you of your duties as a husband, and instils a million-dollar message into your mind - 'women aren't supposed to do household chores all alone'.

The above campaign sheds light on a societal termite that's burrowing the aspirations of innumerable women irrespective of their class. Women from all walks have somehow bore the brunt of the above, and are still, and will keep on bearing for decades to come - unless men and society get sensitized enough.

"Beta shaadi kar lo ghar ka garam khana milega" (get married son, how long are you gonna depend on an unpalatable hostel/mess food).

The above (pathological) saying is so rampant in our society that it's marring the educational, professional, and personal goals of women, and shredding their scintillating tapestry of dreams to a huge extent for many years now.

To all those men and families, let me reiterate some points that you really need to fit in your brain!

NO!

You aren't getting married to get fresh cooked food!

You aren't getting a wife to get all your household chores done!

A father's not giving up his daughter after investing heavily into pure emotions and spending a huge chunk from his lifelong savings only for performing these menial day-to-day jobs at your place.

(A specific group of people who are everything but a true feminist in spirit may contest the above, calling it a patriarchal statement. Let me keep it up for another day. Useless to indulge in trivial altercations.)

Without mincing my words, let me put it this way - you are a man of ordinary worth if you're making or letting your wife/girlfriend/live-in partner solely do household chores even at her own will (unwillingly, no question!).

I can't say this on behalf of all men, but at least for me and many other like-minded ones - being a good partner/husband doesn't just mean that you #ShareTheLoad, but actually don't let her take any load in the first place. 

Or even if there is something that she actually wants to do, and it isn't a laborious chore, you would always keep the bigger percentage of work to yourself. Say in the ratio of 60/40, 70/30, 80/20 - you would always keep the former for you. (Don't expect a 100/0 though, that will turn toxic in no time. Be real, and move away from utopian thinking. After all, everything boils down to a healthy poise - no matter how profound love or care you have for her.)

I had written a post on 'India of my Dreams' a few weeks back. Let me capitalize on this opportunity by adding another one to the list - I dream of an India where men don't let their partners suffer, treat all women with the utmost respect, don't look at other women as commodities to pacify physical desires but as a human of infinite potential & an ocean of pure emotions. (However, no…you need not see your sister in every other girl. Friendships and love affairs, if managed well, keeping the basic tenets (as I briefed above) into consideration are an integral part of a flourishing society).

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"You might have given scars to my body & soul for life today. But I do believe good men still exist. My Andrew is one of the best. Neither will I call down the entire male fraternity, nor the cherishing country that India is, for what you handful of monsters have done to me today. I'll pray to God for you to get the harshest of the punishment, at the same time I'll pray to the Almighty for eradicating the menace of rape from the world by imparting essential morals, ethics and values in all men." Natasha said in a broken tone.

On this Intn'l Women's Day, let us all invoke the feeling of gratitude towards women for everything they have done for us, commit towards making them feel safe and secure, and last but not least, become a man who treats his mother like a goddess; wife as a Queen; daughter, princess; and all other women as incredible gems on earth.